Another seductive highway for controlling relationships is fear of being alone.This road is well traveled by many men and women, regardless of whether they have an abusive relationship. Relationship billboards promise “Companionship” and “Love” which is something we are naturally attracted to since we are social animals. Many of us want to have children and […]
Another internalized predator stems from the cultural imbalance of valuing masculine over feminine , which creates conscious and unconscious biases in all of us. Sometimes the rejection of feminine stereotypes and hostility toward anything female is so strong that it can only be termed misogyny or hatred of women. It is possible you’ve viewed this […]
What gets us to accept blame that is inappropriate? For many, it’s not so much agreement with the blame as fear of “Abandonment”. This sign blazes out in neon at any intersection where they might veer off and disagree with the idea they are at fault. Those whose history has included traumatic abandonment are most […]
The strengths which attract people to this avenue are “Unselfishness” and “Care for Others”. However, controllers warp these values into serving their own interests and neglecting others’ needs. Since unselfishness is never applied to them and caring is defined by whether it is meeting their desires, going down this road has the certain ending of […]
“Gentleness of nature is not a virtue but a defect unless it is accompanied by the tenacity of will. Along with the sweetness there must be strength,” – Grandfather Roy Wilson in Medicine Wheel Being successful necessitates having a healthy amount of pride and belief in ourselves. Some people say we all need some narcissism […]
I’ve selected the word seduction because many times we are not completely aware of what we’re choosing in life. A definition for seduce is: “to persuade somebody to do something by making it seem desirable or exciting”. To this, I would add “or by making it seem inevitable”. Controlling people trap us unawares by identifying […]
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