The need for “Connection” is one of the signs that draw us into any relationship, whether intimate, work related, friendship, or professional. We become committed and want them to continue if we value them. Trust is a necessary element in order to invest in people. As social beings, we benefit from the complex inter-relationships that […]
“One of her greatest fears is that her partner will change after she leaves and someone else will reap the reward of her effort. She lives between if I can just hang on long enough, he will change and if I leave and he changes, I will miss out.” Joanna V. Hunter[1] This seductive […]
It is healthy to receive attention and admiration from others as well as to give it. Sometimes in the beginning of a relationship, we feel like the other person can do no wrong. However, if this is too extreme, it can be a danger sign. If you’ve ever been put on a pedestal, you know […]
Another seductive highway for controlling relationships is fear of being alone.This road is well traveled by many men and women, regardless of whether they have an abusive relationship. Relationship billboards promise “Companionship” and “Love” which is something we are naturally attracted to since we are social animals. Many of us want to have children and […]
Another internalized predator stems from the cultural imbalance of valuing masculine over feminine , which creates conscious and unconscious biases in all of us. Sometimes the rejection of feminine stereotypes and hostility toward anything female is so strong that it can only be termed misogyny or hatred of women. It is possible you’ve viewed this […]
Many people wonder about how they slipped into a controlling relationship without realizing it until too late. Others say that they saw the “red flags” but didn’t heed them. In addition to asking themselves “why does he act this way?” they sometimes feel badly about themselves because they “allowed” it. I remind them that they […]
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